Training.

Training.

Damn.

I got training today. Also, I'm very sucks in it.

Damn..

I hate training but what should I do. I have to go because there is grading next sunday.

Damn...

Pressure.

Pressure.

I've been thinking too much since early this year. And today, supposed that I should be home by eleven? But then, I decided that I do not want to go home yet. I cannot seems to concentrate on my studies but I will try too. So I went to Kitty's house. Then there is this little girl whom Kitty called her little hamster who cheered me up (along with Kitty herself ^.^). Finally I have had let out my worries. I have had my answer.

...

Signing off

Tired.

Tired.

Gosh I'm damn tired. I've had been studying since I reached home hours ago. I need to brush up my maths. Because I got C for my maths 2 years ago! So this time I need to get either A or B. Further more, I aimed for As or Bs for all modules.

Today, Somebody mistaken me with someone. Thought the person was me, they mocked me yada yada and I was freaking pissed off but tried to keep myself calmed (I bursed later then) but then they found out that they gotten the wrong person.

Who got the last laugh now????

AND further more, one of them who tagged along with those group of hyenas happened to be my ex-collegues and he was my junior!! Also, he is like younger than me!! About my younger brother's age!!! He had no idea who he's messing with!!!!!!!


Signing off.

"Untitled".

"Untitled".

School is okay but... Its sucks! Difficult for me to find a friends!! Since there is only 3 girls in class! I want to die!

I'm gonna cut my hair. Found these 3 photos which I find it cute!

Here is the video I took on my cousins nephew's birthday.

When you have a lot of brothers, this is what happen... Everyday...

Shabree, Danish, my mum and me (the white ghost).

Shabree and Danish (who smiled very widely).

Danish and me.

Mum and Danish.

The whole family.

Signing off...

Making Film Part 10 Mag "Vogue" Photo Sketch


The first part of this video cracked me up!

"Hi, My name is storm."
"Blue team!"
"Hero from blue team!"

Hahahaxx!
What the hell?!!

Signing off.

boredom strikes again.

Boredom strikes again.

School will start next week and I am so nervous! Gosh...

Here's my pairing... I know I am being pathetic but its just a fiction.

Rainie....

Jae Joong....

Isn't he cute? Hehe.. Actually, he reminds me of one of my close friend, let me call her Ai (Ai means love in Japanese. I call her Ai because she is a loving and lovable person! In my point of view). Honestly the both of them are much alike! What I mean is everyone's negative 1st impression towards them, physically the both of them are pretty and fair, attitude-wise and personality are all the same and I am not lying! That is why of all the member, I prefer him because he reminds me of my dearest friend! Haha. Its a lame reason I know but It is the truth.

I love all of my friends. They are like my family.

Hehe...

*Change topic*

I had encounter a person whose an emo but tried to act like a b****. Lets say this person's name is A.

Everyone was (still I doubt) tired of talking with A because A was (and still I doubt) damn emo. If you talked to A before, You could understand me... Really!

Talking to emos in my point of view is okay but to some peoples its quite troublesome. For me, everyone is have feelings (unless if it happened to be psychos). But an emo with a big fat mouth??? "Got to go".

Signing off...

disturbed

Disturbed.

I can't sleep now because I feel disturbed and I don't know why. I kept having the same dream

(actually not the same situation but the same person).

I feel sad (feels like crying), disturbed, angry, etc.

I don't know what the future holds!!

I guess I need to leave it to fate.

Also, I had weird dreams lately. I dreamt of the same person. Either he of his friends (if not him). But it was in different situation but the feelings a bit unstable and really pierce my heart.

I love this photo. Cute.

Rainie Yang whom I paired up with Kim Jae Joong in my Fanfic.

Untitled.

Untitled.

Been thinking a lot these days.

And now I am starting to type like L. (Like eww...)

I drink a lot of coffee too. (No wonder I felt weak these days)

My eyes is about to burst but I do not want to shut it or rest.

Witches scares me. <- Sounds lame. I know...

The one you can see by your own naked eyes are those you watch on television (Such as Sabrina the teenage witch, etc)

The one invisible are those witches bitches.

You know what I mean.

Some pieces of advice I could give for those who had encounter person who have interest in you,

Accept them if you seriously, truly do have interest in them sincerely want to be friend with them and not for fun or for the sake of their looks.

You might having fun playing with their feelings but them?

If it was me, I tell them off straight-forwardly if I do not want too.

If its a good-looking guy -> I think you got the wrong person.

Ugly and pervert guy -> I hate perverts.

Handsome but pervert -> You got the wrong person.

The guy my friend more like a brother -> Uh, NO.

But what if they say "But, I know you?"

Simple. Just hanged up (If on the phone).

Because why? Treat it as a prank calls.

Signing off.

Life sucks

Life sucks.

I cannot pursue my dream. Cannot go for school that I want. I am like a robot. But I will burst anytime.

Now I only got My Noo-Noo. (Acually her name is Sayang "little Nara")

I love my Noo-Noo. My Sayang.

Nothing much to type on. Telling anyone would it change the situation?
I rather keep it to myself as a secret and let myself burst.
Maybe if I burst then this problem could change.

My Noo-Noo...

Valentine.

Valentine.

Yup, on valentine's day I celebrate it with my friend Renuka. Hehe.

Well, not really. Haha. What I mean is that I spent my day with her on 14th feb.

I rather spent the day with my friends and family than someone I do not know.

Hmm.

The valentine gift from cutie Renuka.

The rose from cutie Renuka. Hahax.

How cute can this be?

Signing off. (^.^)v

Storyline

Storyline.

It's official. I am not going to enroll Harriet. My dream shattered. My passion and dreams become ashes. I have no idea what to do in the future, what I would do for my career. What is my career anyway.

I want to go to school. Never wish to be stuck at home. T.T
Life now sucks too.

By the way, on my previous post, I had introduced to my first fan fiction titled:
"My dongsaeng, my little angel."
Dongsaeng=little sister/little brother.

Character:

Kim Jae Joong: A doctor, son to a millionaire father, Kim Dong Hwan. Still looking for his long-lost little sister and mother. A bit of a spoilt brat, thinks that he owned all the girls just because he had the pretty face. But he's actually kind at heart. Things changed after he met Geun Young.

Moon Geun Young: A timid, quiet girl who lives with her strict, protective mother. Struggling with her poor life with her mother to earn living and to pay off her university fees. She does not know the meaning of love. And also clueless about her family history.

Rainie Yang: Geun Young's bestfriend who eventually falls for Jae Joong. She was always there protecting Geun Young.

Kim Ki Bum: Admires Geun Young alot but was rejected by her. He still pursue her although been rejected by her. and taught her the meaning of love.

Sypnosis: Moon Geun Young, was separated from her father and brother (Jae Joong) with her birth mother who disappeared from the kim's mansion and raised her living in an ordinary life. 20 years later, both siblings (JaeJoong and Moon Geun Young) met unexpectedly by the broken heart gold pendant.

The gold pendant are unique as it was made especially for both siblings. It is called the brother and the sister. Comes with a pair of bracelet the parents.

You need to check it out. plus do leave a comment!

***

Bored.

Check it out.

Really bored right now. I am slightly relieved that my cousin sister will help me appeal for polytechnic if I am unable to enroll there.

Right now, I am updating my fan fiction. check it out.
http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/bunnie

Busy right now. Got to go. Night.

Blanked.

Blanked.

You should be thankful if you be able to fulfill your dreams. I have dreams but I cannot fulfill it.

The reason: Forbidden.

You know how it hurts me. To be the shadow. The puppet like a moving chisel. I tried so hard to remove the wall but its just too hard and sealed securely. I cannot escape but to remain here as a puppet.

I cannot escape...............

sObs0b................


Something that I am able to do. Is purely forbidden. How can I achieve and be successful if something that I am talented, something I poured deeply on is absolutely forbidden.



Being over-stressed and pressurized by family problems and for my future myself. The feeling is difficult. I want to die for being forced and forbidden like this!
And honestly, it took me hours for me to write this whole post because I cannot stop crying.

I can only fulfill my dreams in my dream. I cannot do anything that I want. So do not blame me if I am trying to commit suicide.

**

What a busy weeks!

I had been so busy therefore I am unable to keep updates on this blog always. I have had been busy lately (work and online school) until I have always miss my sleep and also the bus. Not forgetting improper meal (in fact, I did not take my meal except Tim Sum and bread). Until I started to fall sick last two days ago. Now I'm getting slightly better and need to take good care of my health. I'm getting skinnier and gosh how terrible it is to miss work! But I still have the flu though.
Few days ago either, I furnished these small parrots cage and I feel happy about it! Look how cute it looks! There is two huts, left is the old one and right is the one I just bought (its for lovebird to lay eggs actually so its meant for my little Nara! hahax!). The middle is the nest for them to sit and lay around. And the blue bowl is the bathroom! Cute is it?! I doubt I would buy the swing.

My birds new furnished house. I'm try my best to make it look better and comfy also best for them.

Next week is my graduation day and I'm feeling very nervous! Below is what I will be wearing.
White blouse, $32. Blue dress, $79.
Plus I will be wearing it with Grey skinny jeans (hope it does not look so obvious like jeans) and white ballet flats. Hope it goes well and hope people would not notice me wearing jeans! Gosh I'm nervous!

The outfit I will be wearing with Grey skinny jeans and White ballet flats.

I have been feeling down for no reason. Everyone is growing up. My friends especially Kitty are going to settle down. Me? Still schooling ( actually waiting to apply for polytechnic if not private institute). I want to grow up and settle down too. Some more, I want to study in Korea or Japan! But my parents especially my mom will not let me. I need guardian at least my brother. Or alse go and get marry then I would be able to go. Other alternative? She told me, "Under my grave!"
But she onces asked me if the whole family are able to go on vacation, where would I want to go? Is it korea? I denies it but the fact is that I really want to go Korea (or Japan).

I need a rest because I am working tomorrow. Nite nite!

Some days.

Some days.

I feel ease a bit now. After meet up with my friends. Gosh what had happened to world today?!
Honestly I may look innocent but not so innocent but I am not manipulator, not a fake, I never pretend innocent. I am me. How I treat others is how I truly are. What I mean as myself not being so innocent is that I am boyish, temperate(which I myself trying to improve on it).
Gosh I have had started to listen to those old days times where Rock, metals only plays to my ears. Please stop it!.
With that reason I try to listen to pop songs. Yes I know its lame.

To my friends, be strong for whatever circumstance you are facing. And I know I am not strong enough and trying my best to be strong. Be strong! And remember we got each other so you are not alone! Remember that!

Note: Nurul, Hairuliah, Bibah, DIANA!! where are you girls? Miss you girls to the core! Love you all!

Thoughtless mind.

When you have a dream and hoping if it could come true,
but it seems impossible and I am hopeless.
I did not know what to do or able to do.
All this is utterly impossible.
What am I possibly supposed to do?
Should I continue pursuing it or just give up, I do not know.
This is unreal to me but trying my best to make it real.
Waiting seems worthless and it sadden me atrociously.
I want grieve but it seems impossible.
I never want to mourn but it seems possible.
Hours ago while time passes by in my mind thought My life would end which I never wish to.
Worthless. Hopeless.
I want to grieve.



.......



I want to cry but I cannot.


Help.


Help me.
Save me.
Save me please because I am crying.
I am crying.
I am crying please, please save me.

Christmas Day

Christmas Day

An hour more to midnight and it'll be Wednesday 26th December '07. By the way, Merry Christmas!!

How to start this. Well, I feel a bit down these few days. I'm completely clueless on my feelings.
Just want to break down and cry. Been sad for no reason.
I am strong! Cheer up!


My life do filled with bitters and sours.
And so does my feet thanks to the heels.

Blisters! Urgh! And yes I know what you guys thinking. My feet ugly and fat.

BITCH

I HAVE THE MOST STUPIEST BLOODY BITCH BROTHER IN THE WORLD.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just another day.

Just another day.

I went to Hougang mall today with everyone staring at me. Don't ask why. Well, I'm gonna tell anyway. Its because I went there worn my leather bag, white heels with my Elizabeth Arden's perfume. Now you know.

Acting cute before going to Hougang mall.

I know. what's with the heel?! As you guys know, I hate heels. I told myself once that I would NEVER wear heels. But why do I wear? I tell you why.
Few days ago I complain to my mum that I need to buy new shoe and there is only the heels I got left. She told me "NO!". She told me either to donate the heels or I have to bare to wear the heels.
So, there it is. I have to wear the heels, like, ever.

My ugly feet and white peep-toe heels. It was dark because the place is dark.

And I bought new earpieces.

My new earpieces.

By the way, I need to go to my old school tomorrow and I have no idea what time I need to be there. I had prepared for the worst.